Topics of Life

Everyone is in our life for a reason.  Most of the time we would like to know what those reasons are.  People frustrate us and confuse us but for what? Personal gain? Who knows.  Its just frustrating.  It all doesn't matter in the end.  In the big picture.  Its just the task of enduing to the end I guess.  Some people don't understand things or are to thick to realize them and so the make up excuses or try to get rid of the issue at hand.  They don't care to solve the problem or to understand the issues at hand.  I really can't stand people who use others for their purpose or exploit them for their weaknesses.  Now I may be hypocritical because in certain instances it is appropriate to do so but not for your own gain.  Some people just aren't as smart as others and cant see that they are wrong and wont admit it is so.  Drives me nuts.  Then there are those who think that they are better than others because of their qualifications or their experiences.  It makes you more knowledgeable but not better.  Everyone is the same and deserves the same respect, unless they prove to not deserve any respect.  There are cases where people do things willingly that are really unforgivable and others that can be understood.  But somethings just are not acceptable to be forgotten.

Im not making any sense but I figured it doesnt matter because this is me just running thoughts out of my head on to the computer.  Some times its easier to let the keyboard know things rather than humans.  But anyway, its just easier to write these things and then delete them soon after

Im out of things rambling in my head,

Until next time, if there is one before the two years I will be spending away from this confusing place.

Famous People

We all have our famous people.  Those we look up to, those we hold dear to us and those that meeting them would complete our lives.  Its really weird when you get to meet them too..... The only real experience Ive had with this is warped tour 2010.  Ive heard the bands through the speakers but they really never seem like they are real.  Just sound waves. Then I got a twitter and started following all the people that were in bands I admired.  Everyone all of a sudden started becoming real.  Sort of.  Then I went to warped tour and all of these people were standing within 30 ft of me.  It was crazy.  I got a picture with Jess Bowen which was sick.  I guess this is just a result of me kind of having a sheltered childhood and listening to 80's music all my younger days.  The same thing occurred at the dedication of the BYU-I center, and at general conference when I saw the prophet.   

This blog came about because there was a guy from a band that is LDS and is in Rexburg so Jessica and Damon freaked out and so we drove around town in hope of running into him.  Spoiler alert! we didnt run into him.

Anyway thats all I got.   Its just something crazy that ive thought about and what not. Oh and I also pre-ordered the summer sets new album Everythings Fine.  Im syked to listen to the whole album cause I love Someone like You. 

My Beliefs

This is a homework assignment I had and thought it was blog worthy.

1.      The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter –Day Saints.  It is very important to be a member of this church and believe that it is the truth and all the things we learn in accordance to the church are true.  I know that all the things I am taught at church are true and that we need to be very proud of our high standards and do our best to live them.

2.      Families.  Families have been a huge part of my life and I know that they are an essential part of Heavenly Fathers plan.  They create a unit where a child can be raised and taught the things they need to survive in this life.  Families should care and look out for each other and do the best they can to protect each other.  They also provide a great system of trust and safety for those that need it.

3.      The Plan of Salvation.  I really believe in the plan of salvation because I know that I will see my mom again in her perfected glory and that all families will be reunited again.  She was a huge part of my life and she is greatly missed and by believeing the plan of salvation I know I will see her again.

4.      Freedom.  I believe in freedom because we should all have certain rights that allow us to use our Moral Agency.  We deserve to not have to worry about our lives being in danger doing routine things in our day.  I know that we should all be allowed to be allowed to have our freedom and when we abuse our freedom there will be punishments.

5.      To not judge others.  I believe in the idea that we shouldn’t judge others depending on their race religion or looks.  When someone judges someone then there is potential for hurt.  The thing we want the least of.  It’s not necessary to put a label on others for enjoyment or for any other reasons.

6.      Peace.  There never will be absolute peace in our lives. There will always be turmoil but I believe that if we insist on being peaceful the most we can then things will always work out better for ourselves.  Sometimes it requires force upon those who have no rules but we need to make the best decisions we can in order to be safe. 

7.      Down Time.  I believe in everyone’s life they need down time in order to stay sane.  It can include family time, friend time, play time, anything that relaxes us.  In our busy lives there is tension and stress, but somehow we need to find time to relax and take some time for ourselves. 

8.      Communication.  I believe communication is very important in our lives.  To keep healthy relationships we all need good communication.  We need to have conversation with our Heavenly Father, our parents, our extended family and our friends.  It is the easiest way to avoid tension and arguments.  Most of the little fights that siblings have are due to miscommunication. 

9.      Work.  I believe that we all need to know how to work. Not necessarily working out on the farm but know how to work at getting a task accomplished.  If everyone had a drive to work and be do the best job they can, so many employment problems would go away.  It is a very important skill to develop as a child.  

10.  Desire to change.  I believe everyone must have a desire to change in order to become a better person and to benefit everyone around them.  If people are gloomy and depressed they need to want to be happy and cheerful.  Others look up to people like that.  And if someone goes through such a change they will be stronger.

1.      

This one goes out to the gospel.

I believe there is one thing that has got me to where I am today and the is the True Gospel of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.   I have no idea what I would do without it and I dont know how billions of people go throughout their day in the world not knowing that things I have been taught since I was a child.  I think its so cool that my brother at 3 yrs old could identify a picture of Christ.  Its crazy to think that there are people that we come into contact everyday that dont know any of the life changing truths that us Mormons know and are taught as soon as we can retain knowledge.

One of the coolest things in my opinion of our church is the importance of families.  They are the most crucial unit of people ever.  Mothers and Fathers have one of the most important jobs ever.  And this is one of the reasons I am so excited to be a parent when the right time comes.  I cant think of anything more gratifying than being a parent and knowing your raised virtuous, trustworthy kids.  I just want to know that feeling.  But I love my family regardless of the countless arguments and the fighting and the disagreements. My family is a little more out of the ordinary but regardless they are the best.  There is nothing more enjoyable than just hanging out with the family laughing and having a good ol time..  Friends are great and are sometimes more fun than the family but in retrospect the family will always be there and there is a connection that bonds siblings and parents together no matter the events that come between one another.

One thing I love about attending the Lords University is that everyone has the same basic knowledge and a spiritual conversation can spawn out of no where. And I love it.  Theres nothing than the awesome feeling of discussing gospel topics with friends and getting a witness from the Holy Ghost over and over again that all of it is true.  Its absolutely undeniable.  I understand reasons to why people do reject the gospel and think that our teaching are false but I know it to be true.  And that all that matters.  I will do my best to share my knowledge with the people of the Ribeirao Preto Mission but nothing will be able to waver my faith and I will be diligent in doing what the Lord needs me to do.

I feel my strongest testimony I have is of Joesph Smith and the Restoration of the Gospel.  I dont know why... it may have to do with my seminary teachers testimony of him but its always stuck out the most in my mind.  Every time Joesph Smith is brought up I get that tingling feeling you get when you undeniably know something is true.  I just feel like its so powerful and I feel sorry for those who think he was a false prophet.  He was and Amazing man.  He is really my greatest example next to Christ to follow.

I am definitely not perfect and I have my many faults but I do my best to be better because I know what I should be doing and I feel terrible when I dont do something I should be doing or do something I not supposed to be doing.   Ive got a lot of work to do to become the person I would like to be but I know I can achieve it with the help of all m friends, family and the gospel.

I could go on for days but I need to go to bed.  I know everything about the Gospel is true and I look forward to go through the temple to get my endowments and serve a mission and come home and get married and have a wonderful family and an amazing time here on earth in the mortal existence.

Until next time.... 

P.S. My brother Brad inspired me to write this one.  Im really excited for him to come home and be able to hang out with him for a bit before I leave.   Thanks.

The Weekend

I love the Weekend.  Theres something about Friday afternoon that is soo refreshing and satisfying.  This weekend Im visiting the Goodmans in Gooding Idaho.  Its about a 3 hour trip but its worth it. These girls are the best.  In general college weekends are more different than anything I have experienced.  Because it is up to you whether you have enjoyable one or not.  You can plan things that will be fun or plan things that will create memories for a life time.  You can Literally do anything you want to.  Although there some restrictions due to weather and the amout of energy your friends have and how deep your pocket is.  But other than that you can do anything. 

College so much fun. 

Keeping Busy

These past few weeks have been quite busy. Lots going on and plenty to talk about.  I got my mission call to Ribeirao Preto Brazil which I will be reporting to the Brazil MTC on September 28.  Right now the pressing matters are getting my passport so they can start working on my visa.  I twisted my ankle yesterday which is a pain because its going to suck walking to class.  It probably wont be better for at least 3 days.  In reality itll be a week.  Ive got a grip on all of my classes for the most part.  Keeping track of all the homework anyways. 

This past while Ive been feeling a little odd.  I just feel like I dont belong and that Im not where Im supposed to be.  I feel unnoticed and unwanted.  Today going to church Damon said "are you ready for everyone to ask you what happened?" referring to my hurt ankle and I knew I wouldnt be asked once. And of course I was right. It also just might be the fact that I hide it well.  I have the odd desire to be alone a lot.  Im sure this feeling will pass but Im just writing down what Im thinking.  The Song "the first single" by the format is really hitting home to me right now.  The chorus goes "You know me, or you think you do.  You just dont seem to see. Ive been waiting all this time to be something I cant define" " lets cause a scene clap our hands and stomp our feet or somethin" 
I just dont seem to want to be noticed.  Unlike others who want to put themselves out there the most they can regardless of them denying it.  I dont want to.  It feels like everyones life is better and that everyone has a sweet story to tell about their youth that is funny and satisfying to others to hear.  Mine are all really depressing and hopeless.  Im surprised Im where I am right now.  Skimming across the bare minimum.  Story of my life.  Ive learned the things Ive learned because I wanted to know them.  Sometimes I wish I had a different, "normal" childhood.   

The timing for these feeling couldnt have happened at a worse time.  But Im ok with it.  Ill get over it just like every other hardship that has been throw in my face.  It is what defines us as individuals. And where we stand.  I think Im standing in the wrong spot. 

Dont feel bad for me I really will be over this soon and everything will be merry again. 

Until then.

Settling In.......

Friday around 830 pm MST I arrived in Rexburg to start off my second semester here at BYU-I.  Now I was really nervous to be honest and so far... Im not nervous at all.  All my roommates are really cool.  And one of them said the best thing EVER.  "No one puts their dishes in the sink" it got me syked for this semester.  But
these are the kindof guys that dont mind sharing their stuff and are really relaxed about everything.  One of them is just into Star Wars as much as I am. 

Now this semester is full of new things.  Completely new roommates,  new apartment complex, new ward, new friends.  And Im amped about it.  Now I have a feeling that their might be somethings that will change not so much for the better right now but for a better in the long run. 

As soon as I got here I really didnt know what I should buy to eat, grocery wise.   So far Ive only gotten cereal.  But ill just have to go to the store and look around and figure this conundrum out.

Yesterday Damon, Craig, Jessica, Claire and myself went to campus to get books and Damons I-card, and we ended up not getting it but we got out books.  Then later we hung out for a bit and went to get Damon a pair of scriptures and do a little shopping.  Then we came home and I went over to Kylies house and met her roommate and chatted for a while which was entertaining.  Then Damon, Claire Jessica and I went to Panda Express in IF.  We had a little trouble finding it but we got there eventually. 



Thats all I got for now.

I honestly dont know what to call this one....

SO i haven't blogged in a while. Im guilty of being a hypocrite.  I check the blogs I follow daily or maybe twice a day. (I dont have a life, Joke, I do)  I just like to read what my friends write you know? So if you have a ton of views over a week. I can garuntee half of them are mine.  Anyway, I always get frustrated when no one blogs for a day or two.  Im pathetic.  So now Im gulity of doing it.  Not blogging that is.  But that really doesn't matter. Ive sat down planning to blog but I pull up the posting tab and my mind goes blank.  So I feel if I write anything it will but random and a waste of time. Kinda like this one.  But Im over it. 

I was over at Damons one night a little while ago and he was playing Frightened Rabbit and I hadnt really listened to them at all.  The only real appeal I had to them was their accent and the fact they sound a lot like Counting Crows. And boy am I a Counting Crows Fan.  So the other day I was looking through my music and decided to "give them a listen".  And I havent stopped listening to them as a matter of fact.  My life really relate to the song "My Backwards Walk".    In a kind of sort of way.  I just wish I could go make and change some crucial decisions that would put me at better standings from where I am now. Please dont get offended I wouldnt take any one of you out of my life. Just change some of my bad decisions.  And act on some opportunities.  
Now dont get me wrong.  I love where I am at in my life, for the most part, somethings could be going smoother, and Im not taking what I have for granted. Well I hope not.  If I am then please tell me and Ill try to fix it. 

My mission call is in the process of deciding where Im going and its really making me exciting.  Im just glad I have a whole 2nd  semester to experience first.  I talk too much about it I think... Well thats ok because thats whats on my mind all the time and all im writing is what on my mind.

I have to say something about this,  I went to singles ward today.  It was fast sunday for 7th ward.  So fast sunday means testimony meeting.  My favorite are the ones that are heart felt testimonies of Joseph Smith or the restoration.  Maybe because that is the strongest part of my testimony.  Needless to say there were two that made me reconsider what kind of testimonies are to be born at the pulpit.  One of them a guy started crying his eyes out. Now Im an emotional person but thats not the place to tell your brother you were a bad example and want him to learn from your mistakes.  The second was a guy that was telling a really long story about small fires and somehow tried to relate to being a big flame and example to the people of the world.  There intentions were good but I just dont understand some people sometimes.

Thats all I got for now, But just one more thing.  I freaking Love "500 Days of Summer". I dont care what anyone says.  Its a funny love story that doesnt work out in the end! Who would have thought. 

Anxiety is Taking Over

My mission papers are in Salt Lake City today.  They will be processed for a good week and the will more than likely show up at my house on monday the 18th or tuesday the 19th.  I will be gone to school so my parents will have to mail them to me.  When I met with President Thompson last night he said I will start getting just as excited as damon. (ive never seen someone as excited as him).  Now that I know where my papers are it is getting to me.  Its like the ultimate letter to receive.  Besides a huge check..... no maybe the call is better.   Im not going to be able to concentrate on school for the first week or so.  But it will be good for me. 

Theres also school that Im kindof nervous about.....  More than I was the first time.  Maybe its because I know what to expect but this semester is going to be so different.  And by so different I mean soooo different. Im living with a new roommate.  And new roommates that I dont know.  Theres going to be new friends.  Im living in a new apartment complex.  I think Im just making a big deal out of nothing.  Although for another 8 days its going to bug the crap outta me.  And when I get nervous I get spastic.   Full of energy and uncontrollable.  For 8 days.

Yesterday I decided I didnt want to work and I think it was a good choice.  I thought I would be bored but I watch Numbers for a good 3 hours and time flew by.  I went to my interview at 8 and then hung out with Damon and watched Arthur at the theater. Great Movie by the way.  I laughed. A lot.  I will definitely miss being able to preview the movies the night or two nights before it comes out to the public.  This weekend should be pretty busy now that I think of it.  We are previewing Red Riding Hood tonight.  I have mixed feelings about it.  But I will watch it regardless. 

I love being comfortable.  With myself and my surroundings.  And I think the reason I stress about doing new things is that I dont know if I will be what I need to be or live up to peoples expectations.  I dont really care about being better than ever one else because I know that Im not.  I guess I just think too much of what other people think of me.  Im not selfish or conceited, well I dont think myself to be and try not to be.  But I just cant find a middle ground.  Thats why I love being comfortable because I can do what I want without any major consequences I guess.  Repetition really helps with getting more comfortable.  Like the more times I go over to someones house and get to know their parents better or just dont feel weird around them the better it is.  But at college its kindof like the other roommates are the parents.  Juat new people I guess.  They are easier to get used to because they are closer to your age maybe. I dont know

Thats all I got for now....

Common Sense

At the moment I am sitting in the theater. Screen 1 to be specific.  While friends, cousins and siblings play xbox.  We have it all wired up to the digital projector.  Anyway ill get to my point.  The siblings apparently invited all of their friends and there are 10 kids total.  One xbox with four controllers mind you.  And 10 kids. Freaking stupid. if you ask me.  And I assumed that there was only 5 kids at the max so I brought the car.  I just dont understand. 

The only reason Im here is because there has to an adult and I thought it would be a good time to blog. And Im a good brother. hah

But along the topic people that dont have common sense blow my mind. "You really dont know how to make top ramen"????!!!! Or they dont know where to look.  I dont think they are stupid, I think their parents must be the biggest air heads to not teach their kids to do or know the simplest of tasks.  What is this world coming to.

I am so excited to go back to school, its almost unbearable. joke. I am excited though. And I found out today that I did indeed have to have an interview with president Thompson and Im scheduled to do that tomorrow. What this means is that I will definitely get may call while Im at school.  Im promised a party and cookies, it will be grand.  But my roomates... They are looking a little interesting. Especially the one that goes by the name of Damon. Weird right? (joke)  but really though this Kenyon kid looks interesting and Craig..... I dont know maybe they will be cool.  But I will find out in a week I guess. 

I talked to my brother for the first time in a long time today.  Via facebook. He wanted to know what I had been up to.  I figured he meant these past few months.  I of course said nothing much.  Then he said that it didnt look like nothing because he had perused my pictures.  But those where from like 4 months ago. Thats old news.  But then again he reminded me hes been gone for 20 months. A lot, happens in 20 months.  I graduated. Went to a semester of college and am now turning in my mission papers.  Time flies to say the least. He also is willing to answer any questions i have but to be honest I really dont have any.  I feel like I will figure it all out just fine.  And that type of stuff generally comes to me naturally. 

 I wont say it now but I will miss home in a little while.  It might take a month but its inevitable.  On my mission I am going to miss my music a lot.  Im going to miss late nights hanging out with a mixed gender. At school and on the mish. Im going to miss the female species as well.  Something about those women. They just brighten my day. Then again there are the others that hang a dark cloud over my day.  Letters and email will be my best friend out there.  

But thats all I got for now. I considered making multiple post because of all the different subjects but Im just not that ambitious. 

My Taste of Music

For some odd reason lately I have really been digging more remorseful music I guess.  The reflecting type of style.  For example Brandon Flowers and Counting Crows.  Now dont me wrong, Im not talking Emo, but self realization.  I go through phases a lot where I will listen to a band constantly non-stop, then I wont listen to them and listen to someone else non-stop, and do that over and over again, general in a circle so I guess Im due for a "The Format" phase.  Now I will still listen to other bands periodically but its not a hard phase.

My Favorite artists right now are (not in a particular order): Brandon Flowers, Ace Enders and a Million Different People,  The Format, Counting Crows, The Killers, Fun., and The Maine.  Now the genre range of these bands are pretty wide, but to me they are similar.  They really have something going on. And I like it. And to point out one song that is freaking good is Bittersweet symphony by Ace Enders, Aaron Marsh (Copeland), Alex Gaskarth (All Time Low), Bryce Avary (The Rocket Summer), Craig Owens (Chiodos, Cinematic Sunrise), Duane Okun (Socratic), Kenny Vasoli (The Starting Line, Person L), Matt Thiessen (Relient K), Mark Hoppus (Blink 182, +44).  Its a cover and I like it. A lot.


More recently though Brandon Flowers. Man this guy is such a good song writer.  At first I never thought the lyrics meant much it was just his way of saying what he had to say.  But being LDS helps so much to understand his lyrics due to him being LDS.  My favorite song being Only the Young, has so much meaning.  It blew my mind when I started making connections with the help of peoples reviews.  Some piecing together had to be done but its some great stuff.  Im not ambitious enough to post the lyrics on here and depict them all but id recommend looking into it.  Its way cool.   I just like how he talks about Redemption throughout the whole album. I thought it was pretty cool that I have been digging into this stuff lately and the past two days we have had General Conference and a few of the General Authorities talked about redemption and forgiveness. I dont know if its just me or its a little bit of a coincidence.

But im falling asleep due to lack of sleep these past few days. So thats all for now.

Point of View

Ive been thinking lately about different perspectives of everyone around us.  Its interesting to think just for a moment (any longer is almost overwhelming)  about what is going on in the peoples lives around you. I'm pretty positive everyone has a reason (petty or not) to do what they do. It doesnt just happen (except for a unconscious experience, ie: sleepwalking).  But if we could just see that something is wrong in someones life or changing even, we need to do our best to do what we can for the better.  Now there is a fine line between being curious or trying to help and being nosy,  nobody likes nosy people.    

I was talking to Kylie on the phone and she mentioned something about wondering if people see different colours than you.  And I argued everyone will see the same colour becasue a single object emits a certain light which we see it as a colour.  Or something like that.  But then I thought of an exception, not necessarily just colourblind people but what if people with "normal" (I use the term lightly) see the colour just a little different.  Or maybe just how they perceive the colour is just a little different.  Everyday life experiences can change the way we look at things and maybe after a life of how ever many years can change the way we describe a colour.  The colour example is a little simple compared to how people see other people or a situation differently.

It all has to do with perception.  

Feeling a Tad Lonely

But its alright.  There is sure to be excitement right around the corner.  Spring break starts this friday which means the cousins are coming and one or two(im not sure) of the theater slaves(joke they aren't slaves) will be leaving.  More work for everyone else. Thanks for thinking about us.  Anyway,  It sucks being the only one who stays up, or I guess for that matter is allowed to stay up on school nights.  Everything is more enjoyable when you dont have to do it alone.  But its only temporary, so Im okay with it.  Just a little more time and I will be surrounded by everything that makes oneself unlonely. (apparently that's not a word).

I watched the movie Beastly tonight.  I have mixed feelings about it.  I think it was a cool story line and everything, it just was way to corny.  They did manage to get some comic relief in there too so that was a bonus.  Other than that I have to give it a  3 star rating.  Hop is coming out this weekend as well and I really hope it comes through with all the advertising its gotten.  It will be a big movie, Im sure.

These are a few things Ive learned from operating a theater: 
It take more than just management and cleaning.  It needs personal understanding and care.   Not to brag but my family has done an amazing job on it and it is already three times the theater it was two months ago.  Now I have taken on the curiosity of how to make the popcorn better.  We got new seeds and they are great.  Except they are now the equivalent of the old seeds. We also have new butter but we are using all the old stuff first.  But back to the seeds.  I got curious and googled questions to find answers.  And of course it didnt fail.  There is oil inside the kernel and when you heat that kernel to 450 degrees the oil turns to steam and the seed essentially blows up.  So I figured out how it works but I didnt understand why the popcorn always seems dry.  And so I used google.  I found an article that recommended putting the seeds in a container and when not in use keep a damp towel over top to preserve the moisture inside the seeds.  Previously the seeds were in a metal drawer that was next to a lot of heat in order to keep the butter liquefied.  So that dries up the seeds right away.  That problem is now fixed by putting the seeds in a new container away from the heat and a towel on them at night and Ive become very passionate about making the best popcorn that we can.
Another thing, operating a theater takes a lot more work than I ever thought it did.  But once you get the hang of it and become passionate about your work it all becomes something else.  So much more.  Its definitely  become a blessing in my life.

Staying Up and Sleeping In

When we were all young we would do anything we could to stay up just to rebel against the rules.  as we got older we were allowed to stay up a little longer but we still didn't grasp why we had to sleep so long.  Then as we reached the teenager age we always stayed up and slept in as long as we can.

I remember when my uncle Sam was at my house when I was probably 8 or so. He was always taking a nap on the couch.  I didnt understand why.  Thats what babies through 2 year olds do because their bodies arent big enough to keep them awake for the normal amount of time.  But as I grew up I completely understood the phenomenon.  Teeneagers stay up to late and their bodies dont get enough sleep to support a growing body. 

To have a healthy sleep schedule an adult should sleep up to 9 and a half hours.  But as society has progressed that time has somehow decreased.  Maybe we are just adapting to not needing as much sleep. Now its like 8 hours.  These past weeks I have been getting 4 to 6 hours of sleep a night and somehow manage getting through the day with out too much lag.  But every once in a while I will have to luxury of not having anything to do in the morning and sleep in till noon or one.  Which I did today.  I figure its just my body trying to catch up on sleep.  And not getting too much sleep. Because that can be detrimental as well.

This will all of course change when I get back to school. Even though I wont have to be up till 930 every morning and only one class on friday.  And the last class at 3. On two days of the week.  Its going to be a shocker but its going to be a blast regardless. 

But that's it for now.

I Dont Miss These Nights

So this is what happens when you have two friends that are busy on the same night.  Im really used to them.  But for the past while I have relived what its like being around friends every night.  Thats why, or another reason why, Im so excited for school. Because the only reason your don't hang out with friends every single night, is because you don't want to.  And the only reason you wouldn't want to would be because you have to much homework.  But I am so grateful for my friends here in Ephrata that don't mind keeping me company. You guys are #1

Working at the theater all the time has really hit me hard too.  Its as though Ive lost all motivation to keep working as hard as I need to.  But the fact that it will only get my treatment (which is better than almost everyone elses treatment, not to brag)  keeps me going.  Its going to be interesting for everyone to adjust to me being gone.  As selfish as it sounds, its true. 


 Id like to type another paragraph but I cant think of anything so Im down and out.

Its Getting Closer

The bushmans left this morning and as Ryan walked out the door and I said "See Ya".  And he replied, "maybe".  It really made me realize, Holy Crap.  Im probably not going to be seeing a lot of people for two and a half ish years.  And others Im going to have the oppertunity to spend a lot of time with before I leave.  Its really creeping up on me.  Ill leave for schoolon April 15 and get done July 26. With one or two visits home during that period of time.  Then it may be a few weeks or a month that I have left at home before I go.  Its just seems like a goliath right now but I know it will go by and I will have good times and rough times.  I know I will come out of it a stronger person.  Itll be fun.  I got a call from my uncle on my birthday about a month ago.  He was talking about visiting us because he hasnt seen the family in two years since his wedding and my brother and I saw him a year ago at my cousins wedding.  Id really like to see all of my family before I leave.  I hope that wish isnt too farfetched but its not too much to ask is it?  They are scattered from arizona to Canada. Its not too bad but its hard for us to all get together.

Theres also the chance of me and Brad crossing over.  By that I mean he comes home right after I leave.  A lot of people ask me about this but its still impossible to tell, until I get my call in a week or so.  I wouldnt be super depressed.  I mean I almost didnt say goodbye when he left because I had something going on and I was about to leave and my dad told me to give him a hug.  (come on dad we are close but not that close)  Whatever happens I know that it will be for the best and strengthen our relationship. Even though I hardly ever talk to him.  I feel kinda bad about it.  Im plan on emailing him at school but who know what will happen to that plan.  

Anyway, Im excited for the future and what it has in store for me. 

The Adjustment Bureau

I watched The adjustment Bureau tonight with my family and some friends.  And personally I liked it more than inception.  It touched on more mind boggling things, personally.  Id recommend you see it.  But anywho. Its about a group of people that make everyones lives go according to the chairmans "plan".  They state that they watch over the whole world.  Which is seriously impossible.  Anyway.  I think it all happens by chance.  Especially if there were humans running the program. Humans are imperfect and always have flaws. which can be good or bad.  but at the end of the movie they end up receiving free will to make their own plan.  Which is the way things are run.  Now i know there are people put on this earth at certain time to achieve a certain something to improve our living on this earth. We all just have the choice whether to be that person or not.  And how we do that is to make the right decisions wherever and whenever we can.  And the "right" decision can be decided by us if its right or wrong.

That didnt go where I was planning but oh well. 

My sleep patterns have been really messed up lately.  It possible its from how late ive stayed up this  passed week but during the day im exhausted. But at night its impossible to fall asleep.  Thats a problem not worth worrying about. 

On a last note,  when we are young we cannot let others control our lives.  Love is gained and lost but we must cope with these problems the best we can.  There is really no need to take drastic, desperate measures.  It is very possible to get through it and the sooner we realize this, the better out of it we will come.  In everyone's lives are places safe houses.  Some more than others but regardless we always will have one no matter what kind of rut we get ourselves into.  Those safe house can be friends, family, faith, or even a physical place.  (that kinda rhymed, unintentionally of course)  (the more i think about it it doesn't)  Its getting late and I need a bit more energy tomorrow due to it being friday and it being a longer work day.  But until next time.

Having A Lot Of Women Around The House

With there being a wedding around the corner there is a lot of talk between the sisters of wedding dresses and every detail that goes along with weddings.  Lots of talk of whos coming and who wont be happy because someone else is there.  Its funny.

So that was yesterday I just didnt have enough to say to make it a worthy blog. In my book anyways.

To wrap up on the top paragraph, Brindy went and got a dress today. EXCITING!!! (lots of sarcasm) but Im glad she was able to find one.  Besides that im really starting to enjoy the late night arguments that happen between Cassidy Ryan Bailey Brindy Tucker and myself.  They range from politics to making fun of Mexicans (no offense, they have their pros and cons)  Beside that fact. lifes just going well.  I need to make a visit at the Pughs house for sure though.  So much to do and so little time. Oh and the theaters parking lot is nice and smooth thanks to Ryan being here. 

22 days till school. Thats all I got.

Making The Most Of Things

Ive got a limited time at home left.  That means no more family and no more little kids running around and no more free food.  Times get tough but its all worth it.  Back to not having much time left at home has made me realize I should probably work towards a better relationship with those around me.  For the most part my family that is.  Now Ive had a rough streak with those Merchant girls. I suppose I just didnt understand them or didnt care to.  But the past few days with Ryan and Cassidy here and everyone sitting down and just hangin out its kinda fun to have late night conversations.  Everyone has something in common. I have definitely leaned that one the hard way.

Today Mandy was over and so was Milli.  Now Milli is a hard one to read.  Granted shes only 2, I want her to remember who I am. Maybe even that cool uncle.  She can almost say my name too, but in the past she hasnt liked me. By that I mean she runs when I go near her and she tries to ignore me the best she can.  But after today I think its changed.  Long story short we had a blast today even though we just played around the house. 

And then there is Dixie. She Cassidys second girl, shes about 3.  There really isnt anyone around her age, her older sister and Jaxon play games that either dont interest her or they are to difficult for her to grasp.  She has quite the imagination too.  So quite often you will find her playing with her little barbies by herself.  This afternoon I decided to sit down and play Rapunzel with her.  She was really excited and she even told me what I needed to say in my part being the prince.  I felt really unmanly playing with barbies and saving Rapunzel but I like to look at it on a different level.  It doesnt matter that I was playing with barbies. I was playing with my little niece that sometime is a pain in the butt, but truly a princess at heart. Its the small things that count and add up for us.   

I really like little kids and im excited to be a dad someday.  Its hard work but its work that will actually be worth it in the long run.  Little kids just have a special spirit about them.  They are all really special. 

Thats my softy rant for the night. 

Registering For Classes

So the wait starts.  Its used to be that you could start registration at midnight if the day of registration but they changed it to 6 o'clock MST. So that means in Ephrata it going to be 5 o'clock.  Another convenience I am blessed with is, my great girlfriend Kylie who is holding two of my classes for me so I only have to worry about getting 3 of them which all of you who have experienced registering for BYU-I, it realllllly sucks.  So me and Damon are getting hopped up on mountain dew to stay awake all night even though he cant register till Wednesday due to being a transfer student.  But the positive side to this is that there are 26 days left till school starts. Im soooo excited to get back to school and get away from the family theater for a while because ive been down there every single night since we took over there.  Itll be a nice break. 

 Then ill be living a totally different life style in four months.  Ill be setting out on my two year adventure us mormons call a mission. A mission to change into a different person and spread the gospel to the best of our ability.  Dont get me wrong im so excited to go and it will be a blast im sure but itll also be over in a flash.  My brother comes home in 4 and a half months and its going to be a close one to whether we see eachother or not.  Im just amped about life regardless.  So much going on in such little time.   My sister is getting married and my other sister is going to have another kid. things are going to change so much.  A wish of mine is that i can see the most of my family as I can before its time to go because they are such an important part of my life. I really need to take advantage of the family I have that live next door as well. Maybe thats something I  can work on as I waiting to go to school.  Oh and I love The Format and Ace Enders & A Million Different People.  Freaking great artists. They will be dearly missed for the two short years.  Thats all for now.

My Last Two Days

When I say my last two days I don't mean I only have two days left I mean the past two days. Just to clear things things up. 

The 3rd was my birthday and on your birthday is the day that you realize how many people you are friends with and how many people take the time to click on the link on Facebook to send you a message. It seems petty but its more than not doing anything.  And its very appreciated. And the phone calls are really fun because you get to talk to family that you don't talk to everyday.  Regardless of the lack of celebration you get on your birthday when your older its still alright. 

The 4th, yesterday, was my cousin Abigail's birthday and I gave her a call later in the evening because I literally slept all day.  At the theater, last night Rango started and we got a few people in for it, it definitely caught me off gaurd.

Megamind, the movie, came out last friday and I didn't get to see it in theaters so red boxed it last night and watched, then watched it three more times this morning.  Its definitely a buy. 

Nothing too exciting has happened but that's what you get when you work all the time, I did get to hang out with Damon the other night and watched The Time Travelers Wife, which is the worst movie of all time.  That's the First time I've hung out with anyone in a month.  Can't wait to get back to school and regain a social life. Although the money is nice being busy its not the most fun in the world. 

The countdown is 55 days till school.

The Next Two Years

I was cleaning my room today and came across a book called What I Wish I'd Known Before My Mission by John Bytheway that my grandma had given me a month or so back.  In the beginning of the book he talked about the day of receiving your call.  And all the excitement and worries with it.  I really made me think about what it will be like for me.  I want it to be special but then again its only a letter from the office of the president of the church that will tell me where I'm going to be for the next two years so I guess its kind of important.

Just thinking about it I got butterflies in my stomach. But then I started questioning whether I am ready for it or not.  I'm sure there are people that are in a more desperate situation than myself, a motto I like to say to calm myself is "There is always someone that has it worse than I do".  It doesn't make me not worry about it but its just comforting that I'm not alone in this fight.  In a kinda-sorta way. 

I'm convinced that everything will work out and that I will do just fine but being a worrisome kinda person who thinks about what wouldn't work doesn't help.  Tomorrow I have my dentist appointment which will for the most part wrap up my papers which is the first step.

Its definitely going to be a story worth finding out what happens.

Growing Up

Getting older is a weird thing. People respect you more, generally speaking of course. There are less restrictions that can hold you back and you can physically do more. When your young you want to be older and when your older you wish to be young again.  Its odd that way.  Ive discovered that when your nearly 20 years of age the younger kids tend to not grow as fast.

I was hanging out with Jaxon and when I looked up his picture on the wall and its from about two years ago.  Since then he has grow twice his height and his hair has changed color.  He grows everyday but yet it seems like he never changes. 

Its a phenomenon that I wont ever understand.  But I guess its just something we all have to live with. 

Meeting New People

This is something that everyone has to deal with all the time.  Whether we enjoy the people we meet or not is generally up to us.  There can be those people that just have that attitude that clash with yours or there are those people that you click immediately with.  But another factor is time. With time a friendships can be created or in other cases fall apart.  Ill focus on the positive side though.  Ill use the example of Lightning Mcqueen and Mater.  If you dont know who these characters are, I'm sorry, you really should.  They were a car and a tow truck that lived in two different worlds.  When they first met Lightning didn't like Mater at all, in fact Mater freaked Lightning out quite a bit.  Their friendship didn't start developing until Mater had to watch him on night and they went out and did tractor tipping.  They had a really good time and their relationship developed from there. 

That is how most friendships start.  I've met a lot of people in my life and sadly I probably don't remember half of them.  But others I will never forget. More than likely its because I had a really good time with them or many good times with them.  Take my college friends for example.  There were six of us and granted it was quite difficult getting us all together but we always had our good times. 

In order to keep a good healthy relationship with your friends you have to understand them.  Its important to know what upsets them and how they react when they are upset so it can best be avoided.  Or what makes them smile and laugh. 

Its kind of like becoming friends with a younger kid.  Little kids are very quick to judge. Sometimes they don't even like people when they first see them or vice versa.  Although some people can change their minds with a bribe or something along those lines. 

The bottom line is that we need to keep the ones we care about happy and feel secure. And then for the most part everything will work out.  Then we just have to deal with the ones that we dont get along with.

My First Blog

Ive never had a blog before but some of my friends do. I really enjoy reading them and respect what they write.  So, I figured I may as well start one. It can also be a journal in a sort of way, considering I'm terrible at keeping one we will see how thins works out. 

I'm that kind of person that thinks a lot to themselves and never really talks to anyone about stuff.  It really helps having friends that are so close to you, that you can share anything with them. I am fortunate enough to have a handful of them. Although I have friends like that, I still don't share very much.  A reason for this may be that I had a some sort of rough childhood.

Not very many people know the whole story, but I have been very shy for the majority of my life.  I grew up in Beautiful British Columbia, Canada.  I was home taught by my mom for the first three years of my schooling.  Then one year my mom decided that it would be easier on her to try to send on of the kids to public school. I cant remember if I volunteered or it if was a random draw of the straws but I was chosen.  This was the first time in my life where I had to make an effort to make friends.  I still remember a lot of experiences I had there. It probably helped that every student got an annual as well. To reflect on memories and such.  After that school year my mom was diagnosed with cancer.  She wasn't able to get treated in our little town of Creston so she had to be taken to Kelowna B.C.  She was there for about 9 months. My Dad wasn't finding any work that could sufficiently support us.  So he came down to the U.S. and had the opportunity to work and manage the Ace Hardware here in Ephrata.  So us kids, (there were 6 of us at this time) stuck in Creston were left in the hospitality of our moms best friend Darlaa Murphey.  My older brother being as stiff necked as he is, didnt get along with her at all.  Id always hear them yelling at eachother in the other room and then he would storm off into the bedroom slamming the door behind him.  I was 11 years old and i didnt really have any friends at school because I switched schools to a tiny little Indian Reservation school, (not by choice).  I couldnt talk to anyone because my younger siblings just seemed to oblivious to care what I would say and an older brother that could careless anything.   So because of this i think I just bundled it up inside.  

To fast forward we moved to Ephrata, Washington in the year 2003.  Switched schools again and at this point in a kids life its hard to make friends.  All the kids in the small town know each other, hang out at each others places and  have a good normal childhood.  I think its safe to say the first persons house I went to was the Mathers with my brother when I was a freshman.  The first friends house I stayed at overnight was Damon Chlarsons house when I was a senior.   So basically I had a very baseline relationship with any of my friends.  Im sure ive left out parts but im kindof a lonely kid.   18 years of life can take a toll on a kid, but all we can do is grow and learn from our experiences.    

My Senior year in high school I really did open up though,  and I'm so glad it happened because I'm pretty sure that it got me to where I am today.

But thats all for now.  Hopefully I can make thins blogging thing a habit. But maybe not this extensive.
Oh, and its rediculous to think Im turning 19 in five days.....  Im excited what this year will bring.